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Triggered? Learn what emotional triggers are and how to deal with them

November 28, 2023 - 22 min read
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    It would be nice to lock all our feelings into a box and deal with them when convenient. Unfortunately, people don’t work like that — and neither do feelings. We can experience the full emotion wheel at any given time, whether prepared to deal with it.

    As human beings, we’re not designed to squash our emotional reactions. Our emotions give us important information about what’s happening, internally and externally. They’re kind of like our personal alarm system. When our emotions have a clear root, we feel more at ease with them — or at least, more justified in having them. 

    But occasionally (or more regularly than you’d like), you find yourself having an emotional reaction that doesn’t feel aligned with what’s actually happening. Mental health professionals call this a trigger, and they can be uncomfortable, to say the least.

    If triggers can pop up anytime, what should we do about them? How do you identify when you’re feeling triggered? Understanding how triggers form and what they feel like can help you create a strategy for coping with them.

    So, let’s look at these topics and some commonly asked questions about emotional triggers.

    What are triggers?

    A trigger is a person, place, thing, or situation that elicits an intense or unexpected emotional response or causes an individual to relive a past trauma. Any sensory stimulus can be a potential trigger. Triggers are unique from threats. Essentially, a non-threatening stimulus is triggering an autonomic (fight-or-flight) response.

    Some common types of emotional triggers include:

    • Past trauma: Events or situations that remind an individual of a traumatic experience from their past can serve as powerful emotional triggers. This might include experiences such as accidents, abuse, or loss.
    • Negative memories: Certain memories associated with failure, embarrassment, or disappointment can act as triggers, causing a person to experience intense negative emotions when confronted with similar situations.
    • Fear: Phobias and fears are often emotional triggers. For example, someone with a fear of heights may experience anxiety or panic when faced with the prospect of being in a high place.
    • Stressful situations: High-pressure or challenging situations can trigger stress and anxiety. This might include work deadlines, public speaking, or other demanding circumstances.
    • Relationship issues: Interactions with specific people or reminders of past relationship issues can trigger intense emotions such as sadness, anger, or frustration.
    • Loss or grief: Events or anniversaries associated with loss or grief, such as the death of a loved one, can be emotional triggers that bring up feelings of sadness or sorrow.
    • Change: Significant life changes, even positive ones, can trigger various emotions. For example, starting a new job or moving to a new place can evoke excitement, anxiety, or stress.

    triggered man sitting in dark blue room

    How do triggers form?

    Researchers aren’t entirely sure how or why the brain forms triggers. The brain encodes traumatic memories differently than it records non-traumatic memories. Traumatic events often live just outside of conscious memory. However, our brain and body keep a record of the threatening experience.

    To try and avoid future harm, our brains connect the fight-or-flight response to trauma reminders — like a specific smell, sight, or sound. So when we’re exposed to a trigger, we react as if we’re under threat. This causes a reaction similar to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) symptoms.

    Here’s a general and basic overview of how a trigger might form:


    1. Experience: An event or situation occurs that elicits a strong emotional response. This could be anything from a traumatic event to a very joyous occasion.
    2. Association: Over time, certain stimuli (such as sounds, smells, places, or people) become associated with that emotional experience. This is often an unconscious process.
    3. Memory: The brain stores these associations in memory. This is why certain triggers can evoke such strong emotional responses, even if the original event happened a long time ago.
    4. Triggering: Later, when you encounter the same or similar stimuli, they can trigger the same emotional response that was associated with the original event. This can happen even if you're not consciously aware of the connection between the stimulus and the original experience.

    Potential causes of emotional triggers

    Not everyone is equally susceptible to emotional triggers. Some individuals are more prone to being triggered due to several contributing factors.

    Past experiences

    Those who have endured trauma or significant stress in their past are more likely to be susceptible to emotional triggers. The brain's response to similar stimuli may intensify due to the emotional imprints left by past events.

    Personality traits

    Certain personality traits may influence how individuals respond to stimuli. For example, people with high levels of neuroticism may be more prone to experiencing negative emotions, while those with high levels of emotional resilience may be better equipped to handle challenging situations without being strongly triggered.

    Coping mechanisms

    The effectiveness of an individual's coping mechanisms can influence their susceptibility to emotional triggers. Those with well-developed coping strategies, such as mindfulness, problem-solving, or seeking support, may be more resilient in the face of triggering situations.

    Mental health

    Individuals with mental health conditions, such as anxiety disorders, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), or mood disorders, may be more susceptible to emotional triggers. These conditions can amplify emotional responses and make it challenging to regulate emotions effectively.

    Genetics

    Evidence suggests that genetic factors play a role in emotional regulation. Some people may be predisposed to certain emotional reactions due to their genetic makeup.

    Environmental factors

    The environment in which a person is raised and lives can also contribute to their susceptibility to emotional triggers. Factors such as family dynamics, socioeconomic status, and cultural influences can shape how individuals perceive and respond to emotional stimuli.

    triggered man of color sitting thinking on bridge in city

    Symptoms of a trigger response

    When you're feeling triggered, it can feel like you're reliving a traumatic experience. While triggers are different for everyone, trigger symptoms are often the same.

    Trigger symptoms often include:

    • Feeling scared, panicked, anxious, or unsafe
    • Elevated heartbeat, sweating, and difficulty breathing
    • Feeling like you have no control over your emotions
    • Urge to run away, escape, or other avoidant behavior
    • Rumination or negative, automatic thoughts
    • Inexplicable or unpredictable changes in mood
    • Anxiety or panic attacks
    • Physical tension, like clenching the fists or jaw
    • Flashbacks of stressful or traumatic events
    • Delayed outbursts of anger or sadness

    Any of these symptoms can arise in response to the triggering stimulus. However, what makes triggers so tricky to identify is their highly individualized nature. Here are some examples of common triggers and possible responses:

    Examples of emotional triggers

    • A person who lost their parent around Christmas gets sad, argumentative, or tends to withdraw during the holiday season.
    • A military veteran avoids loud noises or flashing lights after returning from a tour of duty.
    • A professional who was frequently talked over and ignored in a previous role may compensate by being overly assertive in their new role

    While it’s impossible to create an exhaustive list of triggers — or even definitively say where they come from — you can begin to see the relationship between cause and effect. Often, once the trigger is identified, it’s much easier to spot what it’s linked to. 

    For instance, in the first example above, the person experiencing grief may not even realize what time of year it is or why they’re upset. Once they connect the symptoms of grief to their current experience, they can begin to unpack them.

    How do you recognize your triggers?

    There are different types of triggers, but they all share one commonality: they're unexpected. A triggering event can be anything from a stressful encounter with a co-worker to a fight with your partner. Sometimes, it can even be something as small as a change in routine.

    But whatever the trigger may be, it's important to know how to recognize it. Here are some ways to recognize when you might be triggered: 

    1. Notice how you feel

    Do you feel anxious and overwhelmed, or are you having trouble calming yourself down? Pay attention to these symptoms when they arise, particularly if they feel sudden or unrelated to your circumstances. If you’re feeling this way, but you don’t know why, there’s a good chance that you’re triggered.

    2. Something is bothering you

    Is there something that’s suddenly weighing on your mind? If it’s a major or high-stakes issue, your concern might not be out of the ordinary. But if it’s a routine occurrence that’s got you stressed, there might be more to it than meets the eye. 

    3. Listen to yourself

    We’ve all had times when we can’t seem to stop venting about a particular issue. We think we’ve put it out of our minds, but when we talk about it, we feel worked up all over again. If you find that you can’t stop rehashing a particular situation, something about it may have you triggered.

    4. Check your feelings

    Trigger reactions are notoriously explosive. After all, there’s a reason why the term “hair trigger” became a popular metaphor. If you find that you’re having an outsized reaction (or many of them), pay attention. You may not be reacting to the situation at hand but to an underlying stressor.

    What is a trigger warning?

    A trigger warning is a statement at the beginning of a piece of writing, video, or other piece of content that warns the audience of sensitive material. This is usually because the content contains references, depictions, or discussions that could be a trauma trigger. 

    Trigger warnings can be helpful for people who have anxiety, PTSD, or other mental health conditions. They can also be helpful for people who have never experienced a traumatic event, but might be sensitive to graphic content.

    These warnings are a good idea to include when the content is potentially distressing and publicly available. It can be distressing to stumble across an unexpected trigger when relaxing, watching a movie, or scrolling through social media. Trigger warnings help the viewer prepare for — or opt out of — content that would upset them.

    triggers-person-taking-deep-breath-at-desk-min

    How to deal with emotional triggers

    There isn’t really a “cure” for triggers. All we can do is identify when we’re upset, try to understand why, and manage our emotional reactions. At its heart, triggers are a reaction to past trauma. Our emotions — and our emotional triggers — alert us to perceived threats in our environment. Awareness and mindfulness are key to understanding why we feel threatened and dealing with those triggers in a healthy way.

    Here are 5 steps to recognize when you’re feeling triggered and keep the feeling from taking over: 

    1. Memorize your reaction

    Every emotion has an accompanying physical sensation. When you’re upset, you likely feel it in your stomach, chest, or neck. Your mind may go blank, or you may have any of the other above-mentioned symptoms. But chances are, it’ll feel largely the same each time.

    Once you recognize that feeling, you’ll more easily identify it as a trigger. That knowledge empowers you to move away from “reaction mode” and into self-care.

    2. Take a break

    It’s never a good idea to respond immediately when you’re feeling triggered. Take time away from the situation to process your emotional response. Once you practice recognizing when you’re triggered, you can start developing coping mechanisms to deal with them.

    Even if you can’t step away from the situation altogether, there are a few in-the-moment practices that might help. Deep breathing can be done just about any time, anywhere. If you’re in a stressful conversation, you can try rephrasing and restating what you just heard to the other person. That gives you time to slow down and begin thinking through your response.

    3. Understand the feelings

    Acknowledging your feelings is essential. Take time to listen to your feelings without judging yourself for feeling that way. Allow yourself to feel whatever emotion you're experiencing without trying to suppress it. 

    A particular event may trigger some people, while a certain type of person or situation may trigger others. If you're not sure what your triggers are, it can be helpful to keep a journal so you can identify patterns.

    4. Work with a professional

    Trauma responses are complex. If you find yourself routinely triggered — or if it feels like you can’t manage your triggers — you should speak with a counselor, life coach, or mental health professional. Even if you feel like you’ve got your triggers under control, talking them through with a therapist or coach can help you refine your coping strategies.

    EMDR therapy can be a useful tool for working through severe trauma. Other common treatments for trauma and PTSD symptoms include medication, cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), and exposure therapy.

    5. Take care of yourself

    Being triggered isn’t a fun experience, and it can be emotionally exhausting. Because this type of stress can involve such intense physical reactions, taking care of your basic needs is critical. Symptoms of hunger, dehydration, and physical exhaustion can trigger — or exacerbate — trauma responses.

    6. Practice mindfulness and meditation

    Engaging in mindfulness and meditation can help you develop self-awareness to better understand your thoughts and emotions without judgment. Mindfulness allows you to observe your triggers and emotional responses without being overwhelmed by them. Regular meditation practice can enhance your overall emotional resilience and ability to stay present in the moment.

    7. Develop a grounding routine

    Having a grounding routine can also help bring your focus back to the moment. Parasympathetic breathing or progressive muscle relaxation are simple exercises that you can use to reconnect with your body and regulate your emotions. For example, if you feel overwhelmed, try taking deep breaths while counting to five for each inhalation and exhalation. This technique can help you relax and observe your emotional triggers without getting caught up in them.

    8. Establish healthy boundaries

    Identify and communicate your boundaries with others. Setting clear boundaries can prevent situations that trigger negative emotions. Learning to say no when needed, expressing your needs, and communicating assertively can contribute to healthier relationships and reduce the likelihood of encountering triggering situations.

    9. Build a support system

    Cultivate a strong support network of friends, family, a coach, or support groups. Having people you can talk to about your experiences and emotions can provide validation and perspective. Sharing your feelings with others and receiving empathy can be instrumental in processing and coping with emotional triggers.

    Remember that these strategies may work differently for each person, and it's essential to find what resonates best with you. Combining multiple approaches and seeking professional guidance when needed can enhance the effectiveness of managing emotional triggers. If trauma is a significant factor, consulting with a mental health professional is particularly important for personalized support and guidance.

    It can help to have a set of go-to self-care practices you can draw on when you need to calm down. If you feel comfortable, share them with a friend, family member, or coach so they can help you decompress.

    triggers-person-journaling-at-their-desk-min

    What is a trigger warning?

    A trigger warning is a statement at the beginning of a piece of writing, video, or other piece of content that warns the audience of sensitive material. This is usually because the content contains references, depictions, or discussions that could be a trauma trigger. 

    Trigger warnings can be helpful for people who have anxiety, PTSD, or other mental health conditions. They can also be helpful for people who have never experienced a traumatic event, but might be sensitive to graphic content.

    These warnings are a good idea to include when the content is potentially distressing and publicly available. It can be distressing to stumble across an unexpected trigger when relaxing, watching a movie, or scrolling through social media. Trigger warnings help the viewer prepare for — or opt out of — content that would upset them.

    Benefits and drawbacks of trigger warnings

    There's an ongoing debate about the effectiveness and necessity of trigger warnings. Some argue that they protect individuals from being re-traumatized, while others suggest that they may not reduce negative reactions to disturbing material and could potentially increase them. Let's look at both sides of the argument:

    Benefits of trigger warnings

    • Prevention of unexpected distress: Trigger warnings can prevent people who have experienced trauma from being unexpectedly confronted with distressing content, which could potentially trigger a PTSD episode or other negative psychological reactions.
    • Inclusivity and respect: They promote an environment of sensitivity, inclusivity, and respect for others' experiences. They acknowledge that everyone has a different threshold for what they find disturbing or uncomfortable.
    • Empowering choice: They empower individuals to make an informed decision about whether they want to engage with potentially disturbing content.
    • Raising awareness: They can also help raise awareness and understanding about mental health issues and the impacts of trauma.

    Drawbacks of trigger warnings

    • Overuse and desensitization: There's a concern that the overuse of trigger warnings might lead to desensitization, reducing the impact when they're genuinely needed.
    • Potential for increased anxiety: Some research suggests that trigger warnings might increase anxiety by priming individuals to expect distressing content, thereby making it more upsetting.
    • Limit academic freedom: Critics argue that trigger warnings can hinder academic freedom by discouraging the discussion of certain topics.
    • Avoidance rather than coping: Some psychologists worry that trigger warnings encourage avoidance rather than helping individuals confront and cope with their triggers in a safe, controlled manner.

    You can manage your emotional triggers

    Our triggers are rooted in our past traumatic experiences. In an effort to protect us from further harm, our brains scan for stimuli that might indicate a threat. That means that sometimes, we have outsized reactions to seemingly innocuous stimuli.

    While trauma should be treated by a licensed therapist, working with a coach can help you develop and refine emotional regulation skills. Emotional regulation helps you master the ability to notice your triggers and do the (often difficult) emotional work of keeping them in check.

    Navigate emotional triggers effectively

    Discover personalized coaching techniques to understand and manage your emotional responses better

    Navigate emotional triggers effectively

    Discover personalized coaching techniques to understand and manage your emotional responses better

    Published November 28, 2023

    Allaya Cooks-Campbell

    With over 15 years of content experience, Allaya Cooks Campbell has written for outlets such as ScaryMommy, HRzone, and HuffPost. She holds a B.A. in Psychology and is a certified yoga instructor as well as a certified Integrative Wellness & Life Coach. Allaya is passionate about whole-person wellness, yoga, and mental health.

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